Comments on: So I caught up with Dennis http://www.jet-pack.net/?p=588 Stories. Tue, 05 Jan 2010 13:03:46 -0500 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.4 hourly 1 By: twitwhois http://www.jet-pack.net/?p=588&cpage=1#comment-531 twitwhois Sun, 27 Dec 2009 18:57:31 +0000 http://www.jet-pack.net/?p=588#comment-531 I struggled a bit with the Explanation(s), but it didn't detract from the story. I thought it was clever and creepy and I like it a lot. I was pleased by the pictures you painted in my mind with the descriptions but left some of the details out in just the right places to let my imagination play with me. Thanks! I struggled a bit with the Explanation(s), but it didn’t detract from the story. I thought it was clever and creepy and I like it a lot. I was pleased by the pictures you painted in my mind with the descriptions but left some of the details out in just the right places to let my imagination play with me.

Thanks!

]]> By: Eliot http://www.jet-pack.net/?p=588&cpage=1#comment-483 Eliot Sat, 21 Nov 2009 14:20:44 +0000 http://www.jet-pack.net/?p=588#comment-483 A perfect lovely tale, nice suggestion, too. A fine introduction to your work. Would that we could all write with such fluency. Keep it up! A perfect lovely tale, nice suggestion, too.

A fine introduction to your work.
Would that we could all write with such fluency.

Keep it up!

]]> By: Will Hindmarch http://www.jet-pack.net/?p=588&cpage=1#comment-461 Will Hindmarch Thu, 29 Oct 2009 16:30:32 +0000 http://www.jet-pack.net/?p=588#comment-461 Wonderfully moody and evocative—dreamlike. The detail, where you offer it, vividly conjures up these junk shops. The detail, where you leave it out, has us filling in our own marks, drawing us in. Masses of worms spilling out of emptying clothes? Afternoon sun blinding us to the face of our old friend? All so good. It may be longer than it needs to be, and it seems to be lacking a bit of the coherence I think we expect from the modern ghost story. But I'm not sure that makes this anything but somewhat old-fashioned, in a good sense. The train at the beginning doesn't, if you'll forgive me, seem to go anywhere, though I appreciate the fearsome suggestion of it. Aside from streamlining the time spent getting from the train station to the junk shops to the nighttime movie watching, I'm not sure what I'd do to improve the tale itself. The telling suffers a bit from the drafting. The one-sided phone conversation is confusing at first, broken up as it is into the same format as your two-sided conversations. You've got a few stumbling typos or errant words, which I'm unable to redline here, but these are all easy fixes. The story will sharpen rather well, I think, when you read it again in a week or so. The more I think on it, the more I like it. I think this is good. Wonderfully moody and evocative—dreamlike. The detail, where you offer it, vividly conjures up these junk shops. The detail, where you leave it out, has us filling in our own marks, drawing us in. Masses of worms spilling out of emptying clothes? Afternoon sun blinding us to the face of our old friend? All so good.

It may be longer than it needs to be, and it seems to be lacking a bit of the coherence I think we expect from the modern ghost story. But I’m not sure that makes this anything but somewhat old-fashioned, in a good sense. The train at the beginning doesn’t, if you’ll forgive me, seem to go anywhere, though I appreciate the fearsome suggestion of it. Aside from streamlining the time spent getting from the train station to the junk shops to the nighttime movie watching, I’m not sure what I’d do to improve the tale itself.

The telling suffers a bit from the drafting. The one-sided phone conversation is confusing at first, broken up as it is into the same format as your two-sided conversations. You’ve got a few stumbling typos or errant words, which I’m unable to redline here, but these are all easy fixes. The story will sharpen rather well, I think, when you read it again in a week or so.

The more I think on it, the more I like it. I think this is good.

]]> By: Koshka http://www.jet-pack.net/?p=588&cpage=1#comment-460 Koshka Thu, 29 Oct 2009 16:29:53 +0000 http://www.jet-pack.net/?p=588#comment-460 Great job Wood, creepy as hell. How am I supposed to work now? Great job Wood, creepy as hell. How am I supposed to work now?

]]> By: TERRIBLEMINDS: Chuck Wendig, Freelance Penmonkey » Blog Archive » Painting With Shotguns IV http://www.jet-pack.net/?p=588&cpage=1#comment-459 TERRIBLEMINDS: Chuck Wendig, Freelance Penmonkey » Blog Archive » Painting With Shotguns IV Thu, 29 Oct 2009 11:57:34 +0000 http://www.jet-pack.net/?p=588#comment-459 [...] Jet Pack. Wood Ingham. Ghost Story. GO. [...] [...] Jet Pack. Wood Ingham. Ghost Story. GO. [...]

]]>